Sisters Tina Pennington and Mandy Williams (aka “Red and Black”) are the authors of “What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired.”
When Tina, “Red,” found out that her husband had lost his job and that they couldn’t afford the lifestyle they were living, she reached out to her financially-savvy sister Mandy “Black” for help.
Black’s adventure trying to help Red understand her long-ignored personal finances drew them together towards the goal of getting Red in control of her money. Their book tells the story of how Red did it, and how you can do it too.
What motivated you guys to write “What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired!”?
RED: This is a funny story. I was a stay-at-home mom and was living what I thought was a perfect “Disney movie,” until one rainy Friday when my husband came home from work and he told me that he had been fired. I waited until everyone was asleep and emailed my sister, “Black,”wanting her to tell me what to do.
She forced me take my “ostrich” head out of the sand and finally face those life realities that I had managed to avoid. We started with personal finance, and then logically progressed to things like time management, relationships, handling stress, and even tackling piles of paper. Fast forward less than a month into my crisis and I see her taking notes. I ask her, quite exasperated, what she’s doing and she tells me, in her typical pragmatic way, that this will make a great book one day. So, while I was having a crisis, she was embarking upon a new business venture!
BLACK: Anyway, I told her I can multi-task so I did not see the problem. But what I did see was that when we started talking about finance, the terminology caused her to shut down. For example, on that very first Monday, when I said “assets and liabilities,” she told me I was the M.B.A., not her, and that she could not do this.
How did you finally manage to connect to her about her financial situation?
BLACK: I tried another approach, and said, “OK. How about we talk about ‘what you own’ and ‘what you owe.'”
I wish I could say I made the next part up, but she replied, “Well, that I can do. I just can’t do assets & liabilities.” When I explained they were the same thing, there was dead silence. Which made me realize there were probably other people who were in the same position. Which means if there is a need, then there is a market. And, as long as I was going to help her, I figured I might as well document everything, so I started saving our emails and IMs.
What did your experiences teach you? And what are your takeaway messages from the book?
RED: Wow, that’s tough, because there are so many. First, and maybe foremost, the importance of learning how to make smart, conscious decisions. I initially wanted answers, but Black forced me to “take a step back” and learn what we now refer to as Q-I-D: ask Questions and gather Information to make smart conscious Decisions. Too often we either look to others to make our decisions for us, do things out of habit, or do nothing. In fact, Black made me realize that “doing nothing” is a decision; it means you’re accepting the status quo.
Another point that made an impact on me: you can eat an elephant, just not all at once. This applies to many large issues or projects, which often become bigger the longer you delay addressing them. Early on, when I found myself overwhelmed, whether in terms of learning about personal finance or dealing with the rapidly growing mountains of paper in my “work room,” I didn’t know what to do first, so I did nothing. It was then that Black gave me this invaluable piece of advice about elephants! And I have to admit that it’s a “mindset” that I return to on a regular basis.
Any tips that can help us kickstart organizing the numbers in our bank accounts?
RED: Think before spending time and money. Black came up with a great way to force you to think about it, and calls them “Green Sheets.” They can be found on our website here.
You’re never too young–or too old–to budget. A budget does not “restrict” your spending. It is the tool that lets you “manage” your money to achieve the things you want. It doesn’t require an M.B.A. to have one. Just desire.
You both are very adamant about keeping things approachable.
RED: Absolutely. This isn’t rocket science. There’s no magic, no “new” approaches. Almost everything in the book, and everything we teach in class is a “duh” moment, when you stop and think about it. The key word is “think.” And it’s important to realize that it’s not so much about the “how” as it’s the “why” of things. For example, it’s not “how do I budget?”–there are plenty of websites and books out there to tell you how. It’s understanding “why” you should budget. Once you do that, then you will seek out the answers as to “how.” And you’ll be motivated to create long-term, lasting change.
Black, in the book you call yourself the “one sister who made her mistakes early and got them out of the way. ” Does that mean you were not always knowledgeable about your personal finances?
BLACK: Exactly. Although I had an undergraduate degree in Economics and an M.B.A. in International Finance, and was working in the finance department of an oil and gas company on budgets and planning, I never applied those concepts to my personal finances.
During the first few years of my career, I managed to get in over my head in debt by buying a townhouse, furnishing it, buying a nice car (although it was used and a great value), buying a new wardrobe that I thought better reflected my “important job,” and then taking a short vacation to Europe to reward myself for accomplishing so much at such an early age. The reality was that I probably could have handled two or three of these items–but all of them at once was more than my paycheck could support and I had to get a second job. I like to say that I made the same mistakes many people make; I just make them bigger and quicker, which is probably a reflection of my personality.
Thank you for joining us, Red and Black! You guys have great insights! Do you have any closing words? Anything else you would like to add?
BLACK: When my brother-in-law got fired, I told Red I thought it was the best thing that ever happened to her. I believe that now, more than ever. It made her, and hopefully others, realize that you only have two choices: you can let your life control you, or you can take control of your life.